Welcome to the Humor Corner (HC). Check back to catch your Jewish chuckle, giggle, snicker, hoot, snort, cackle, chortle, guffaw, hysterics jitter, or double up of the day.
Of course, HC comes with the usual disclaimers. CBHT is not responsible for any after effects …except for helping you feel better, lighter of head and tummy, and throughout the day flashbacks of what you read and chortled over.
Joey Bishop (raise your hand if you remember Joey) told a story about Frank Sinatra, who was dining out one night when a young high school lad came to his table.
“Mr. Sinatra,” said the teen-age boy, “my name is Bernie Rosenberg. Would you please do me a favor?”
“What kind of favor?” Sinatra asked.
“Well, I’m here with my girl, and I want to make a good impression on her. I certainly would appreciate it if you would drop by my table and say, “Hi Bernie!”
“OK, kid, I’ll try said the singer, smiling.
A little later, he dropped by the boy’s table, and said “Hi, Bernie!”
The boy looked up at him and snapped, “Don’t bother me now Frankie, can’t you see I’m busy?”Read_more_...
A Jewish man lies on his deathbed surrounded by his children. “Ah” he says, I can smell your mother’s brisket – how I would love to taste it one last time before I die.” So, one of his sons hurries down to the kitchen, but he returns empty handed. “Sorry papa. She says, “it's for after the funeral.”
A boy comes home from school and tells his mother he got a part in the school play.
”That’s wonderful!” says he mother. “Which part?”
“The part of a Jewish husband,” says the boy, proudly.
Frowning, the mother says, “Go back. Tell them you want a speaking role!”
A Frenchman, a German, and a Jew walk into a bar.
“I’m tired and I’m thirsty” says the Frenchman. “I must have wine.”
“I’m tired and I’m thirsty,” says the German. “I must have beer.”
"I’m tired and I’m thirsty,” says the Jew. "I must have diabetes.”
The atheist maintained that if one lived an ethical, upright life,
he had no need for God. The rabbi asserted these qualities
were fine, but without spiritual values, the real beauty of life
could not be comprehended.
"I don't see where the recognition of beauty has anything to do
with believing in God" protested the atheist.
"Let me illustrate," explained the holy man. "A believer, when he
arises on a lovely spring day, goes to the window, breathes deeply
and says, 'good morning God.' But, when the atheist arises and
goes to the window, he says, 'My God, what a morning!'"
366 words read out loud should take about 2.8 minutes
Humor and the Jewish People
The Jewish people lay claims to the oldest of written histories, as well as an endless list of grievances toward the mostly hostile world in which we have lived. We have endured over 4,000 years of persecution, slaughter, torture, inquisitions, pogroms, and death camps.
We were enslaved by the Egyptians, slaughtered by the Philistines, exiled by the Babylonians, dispersed by the Romans, and butchered and chased from land to land in Europe. A history of pain and suffering, tragedies, of great losses, and of surviving against all odds. Jewish humor, too, has persevered over many a generation. Wit and laughter helped sustain the us in our misery. It also provides us with a unique and insightful tool for the examination of our chronicles, attitudes, and way of coping with reality.
Jewish humor derives from the immense disparity between what was expected to be the glorious destiny of the “Chosen People” who were to be “light until the nations” and our long tormented and often bleak existence.
We perceived ourselves as the “Nation of the Book,” the people who view themselves as an intellectual powerhouse and have pride in our ability in interpreting vast complexities of sacred texts found ourselves powerless in our dealings with hostile rules, malicious brainless peasants, and anti-Semites throughout our history. Though cohesive in our private world, we felt isolated and apart from the world at large. To help cope with this disparity, we Jews created a humor where laughter and tears, happiness and fear were inextricable.
The typical Jewish joke revolves around those situations that are familiar to all Jews, geography notwithstanding. The point of a traditional joke was grasped as quickly by the shtetl dweller as by his more sophisticated brother in the large metropolis.
The humor is full of acute social observations, exposing mental follies and the frailties of human nature. The gist of the jest is often a play on words, double entendres, animated facial expression, and conspicuous body language.
An old Yiddish proverb expresses it poignantly, “burdens are from God, shoulders too.” Shoulders at times bear the load, and at times shrug it off. The humorous element of a conventional Jewish anecdote is as amusing today as it was in days past, forfeiting none of its biting relevance to time.
Lightly edited; Original article copyright David Minkoff
May be freely copied for private use only.
Dr. Michael Miller, indicated people should combine regular exercise with 15 minutes of laughter a day for good cardiovascular health. "It is conceivable that laughing may be as important to maintain a healthy endothelium, and reduce the risk of cardiovascular disease," said Miller.
A Laugh A Day May Keep Heart Disease At BAA
Copyright @ Health Talk
March 9, 2005
Jewish humor examines the role of religion in contemporary life, often gently mocking the religious hypocrite.
So, grab your phone and start or add to the necessary 15 daily minutes. Time yourself. Rule is, you must read Humor Corner out loud with vigor and meaning. You cannot be a silent "laugher." Make noise, please.
A Reform Rabbi was so compulsive a golfer that once, on Yom Kippur, she left the house early and went out for a quick nine holes by herself. An angel who happened to be looking on immediately notified his superiors that a grievous sin was being committed. On the sixth hole, God caused a mighty wind to take the ball directly from the tee to the cup - a miraculous shot.
The angel was horrified. "A hole in one," he exclaimed, You call this punishment, Lord?
Answered God with a sly smile, "So, who can she tell?"
According to http://www.speechinminutes.com/, this short Rabbi story should have taken you .07 minutes reading out loud. Now search out 14.3 minutes more humor. Laugh and stay healthy.